Attack of the Deranged etc.

Attack of the Deranged Mutant Killer Monster Dark Lord


DISCLAIMER: The world and characters of Harry Potter belong to their wonderful creator, J.K. Rowling. The world and characters of Calvin and Hobbes belong to the genius known as Bill Watterson. I thank them both for their parts in making my childhood as fantastic as it was.


Calvin’s eleven years old – well, technically, anyways, but his shorts still reach his ankles – and not much has changed. Until the letter from Hogwarts, that is.

*dramatic music*

*sense of foreboding*

*bloodcurdling screams echoing in the distance*


A Calvin & Hobbes/Harry Potter crossover. 45% whimsy. 20% shenanigans. 20% ridiculous dialogue. 10% indulgent references to things such as Disney musicals and Batman. 5% plot. 100% reason to remember the name, even though it’s really long.

Target age: that of the Harry Potter series, and the Calvin & Hobbes comics. Meaning no matter how old or young or undead or immortal you are, if you enjoyed either one of those, you will probably enjoy this.

Enough jibber-jabber. Below is the chapter list. Let chaos reign.


1. Not Sending Yourself Letter – A Guide

2. Greeting Gringotts – A Cautionary Tale

3. The Robe Shop Of Extraneous Dialogue

4. An Introduction To Wizarding Math

5. And So It Begins, God Help Us All, Part 1

6. And So It Begins, God Help Us All, Part 2

7. A Suitable Sorting Of Sorcerers

8. Masses Of Classes and Magic Molasses

9. Repeat, You Are Not Cleared For Landing

10. Once Upon A Midnight Marathon

11. The Enemy Zone

12. The Problem With A Tiger Is That

13. Not The Adventure You’re Looking For

14. 4.70 HGWTS, Your Quidditch News

15. Digging For Gold In A Deep, Dark Hole

16. Arresto Addendum

17. On The Zeroth Day Of Christmas

18. [Enter Chaos, Stage Everywhere]

19. In The Silence Of The Castle

20. To Battle We Ride

22. Out Of The Bag

23. Raise Your Swords And Shield Charms

24. The Best of Times, The Worst of Times, So Many Times


If you would like to leave a review, please visit the fic on ff.net. Thanks for reading.

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